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Sarah Sadtler Feather

Remembering and celebrating the spirit of Framingham resident, fashion writer, mom and author of a popular ovarian cancer blog, Sarah Sadtler Feather (1971-2011).

I first met Sarah on a soccer field in 2009. A fellow writer and mother of boys, we instantly connected.

Wickedly funny, smart, feisty, vibrant, courageous, gentle, tough, witty, loving, strong and kind, she was also in the battle of her life with ovarian cancer.

Life certainly isn’t fair but Sarah was such a bright, energetic light that it’s hard to stay mired down in that thinking for long if you really knew her.

Her two boys and husband were her world. She took her medical situation in stride and forged a path to what had become the new normal. Yes, she needed a nap every day and was making weekly treks to Dana Farber which she called, “The Cancer Factory,” but she continued to stay positive, fabulous and fashionable whether running errands or picking her kids up from school.

After a recent treatment visit she got sick but was happy to report that her pristine white tee shirt and hair remained unscathed. That was Sarah.

Tough as nails, fashion was her career so she redefined cancer to fit her style, her life and she was unrelenting in her fight against it for herself and her precious family.

In the entire time I knew her she never complained or focused on her illness choosing instead to stay positive and find the humor in everything despite her incomprehensible suffering and difficulty.

She had recently made the difficult and courageous decision to stop treatment in order to be present for her family and spend her last days with those whom she loved most, free from hospitals.

The last email I received from her was on April 26, positive as ever. We had made plans to watch the Royal Wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton with a few other friends at my house before dawn. She wrote:

I know I won't be able to leap out of bed early on Friday morning, but please know that if I were able, I'd run right out to your house! Ed's taking me to Harry Connick on Thursday night!

Happy Easter to all of you,

S

She died at home a week later.

Having spent much of the past nine years with my son in and out of hospitals I’ve learned that the people we meet on the journey we never expect to take are often the ones we value most. The road less traveled can be rich, despite the painful circumstances that brought us there.

Sarah learned this all too well. Through her illness she learned that each day is precious and that memory-making doesn’t just happen, you have to make it happen.

Her blog www.carcinista.com has touched countless people across the globe. Many have said, “Even though I didn’t know Sarah personally, I felt as if I did because of her blog.” Her impact can never be measured. She was real and shared from the heart.

Her husband Ed (a.k.a. Mr. Wonderful) recently sent an email to all of Sarah’s friends and family that read:

Sarah Sadtler Feather LOVED fashion. LOVED dressing up. LOVED looking great!!! For her memorial service, we want everyone to know that this is a celebration of her life. We will be dressing for Sarah to honor her. If you want to wear black, that is okay, but Sarah would have loved great spring fashion and color. If you have questions, let us know.

No more fitting tribute to Sarah can be summed up than this. A service to celebrate her life will be Friday, May 13, 2011 at Trinity Episcopal Church, 81 Elm St., in Concord at 10 a.m.

Sarah asked that, in lieu of gifts or flowers, donations be made in her honor to http://www.firstdescents.org/ or http://www.ovationsforthecure.org/.

One of Sarah’s favorite places in the entire world was Maho Bay in St. John/U.S. Virgin Islands.  I picture her there, full of peace, in what she called “my happy place.”

This poem is dedicated to her memory.

The Little Ship

(adaptation of Henry Van Dyke’s poem A Parable of Immortality)

I stood watching as the little ship sailed out to sea. The setting sun tinted her white sails with a golden light, and as she disappeared from sight a voice at my side whispered, “She is gone.”

But the sea was a narrow one. On the farther shore a little band of friends had gathered to watch and wait in happy expectation. Suddenly they caught sight of the tiny sail and, at the very moment when my companion had whispered, “She is gone” a glad shout went up in joyous welcome, “Here she comes!”

Jim Rizoli May 10, 2011 at 07:40 PM
Jim Rizoli CCFIILE...That was so sad....Hard to believe you can be so alive one week and gone the next. Been almost on the other side myself a few years back that's why I treasure everyday and enjoy meeting those I come in contact with at listen to what they have to say. Of course I do have my say too.... Treasure you health, don't abuse your body, and if you can help those who might be having a hard time with the same issues always be there for them, helping them, encouraging them, because in a blink of an eye they could be gone and you will regret to yourself later on...you could of done more.
Kristen Nason May 10, 2011 at 08:20 PM
Laura , That was beautiful and yes, very sad. From what I have read she had a very full life, albeit too short. She touched(and will continue to touch) so many, fighting the same battle that she so bravely faced with courage and as she wrote "dignity". My condolences go out to her family , to you and her countless friends. I am filing that poem...
Ed Feather May 10, 2011 at 09:01 PM
Laura, Thank you for this lovely tribute to my beautiful wife, Sarah. She was an amazing friend, brilliant cook, loving mother and a spectacular wife. Could not have asked for more. So honored that so many have been thinking about her and our family. With love, Ed Feather
Susan Petroni (Editor) May 10, 2011 at 10:14 PM
Laura: A beautiful tribute! Thoughts and prayers to all her friends, and especially her family!
cindy b crane 1 May 10, 2011 at 10:17 PM
Laura, You are an amazing writer and can see how you and Sarah would have hit it off.......She was my niece and a wonderful women.......She sparked when she entered a room.....She will be so remembered and prayed for and missed.......And she so never wanted to leave her boys and MR.Wonderful.........She was the most wonderful spirit.....And some how some way she will be ever present in their lives......For ever and always.....................
Victoria Hessler May 11, 2011 at 12:14 PM
Laura, Sarah was a friend of mine. You have captured her so well, she would have loved this article. Great job.
Dawna Phillips May 11, 2011 at 01:26 PM
Thank you for this tribute, Laura. Sarah was inspiration for and is missed by so many. Our attention now turns to honoring her life and supporting her wonderful family.
Heidi Zizza May 12, 2011 at 02:10 AM
A beautiful tribute!
bonnie morrissey May 12, 2011 at 04:51 PM
wow, i didn't even have the pleasure of personally meeting sarah, but she sounds like a truly amazing person, and her passion, energy, love for her family, and zest for life, are so clearly seen in her blog. She lived her life to the fullest, and she is a true inspiration to all. My most heartfelt thoughts to the Feather Family and all of Sarah's loving friends.
C Lumolleen May 12, 2011 at 06:38 PM
colleen lum I've been following carcinista for a couple of years always checked to see her blog and said many prayers on her behalf. She had such zest for life and such a sense of humor dealing with disease. My thoughts and prayers go with the Feather family and she will live on in her sons.

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